Those Dreaded Curveballs

Life has a way of throwing us curveballs. Catch them and move on.

“For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers,neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” —Romans 8:38–39

Bad things happen. Infidelity occurs, money problems arise, and friendships sour. These and other curveballs will always be a part of our lives. It’s easy to get depressed, sad, and weary as we, yet again, try to solve this latest problem and deal with that latest setback. We wonder if we’re just playing a losing game.

Scripture says that the love of Jesus stays with us through rainy days, thunderstorms, and tsunamis. Those curveballs can keep coming but they won’t bury us. Stress, bills, and flawed relationships may characterize our mortal lives, but they can’t separate us from the love of Jesus.

In fact, his love separates us from ultimate suffering. Love will win the game.

Consider This:

1. When things seem like they are always going wrong in your life, how do you respond?
2. How does it change your outlook on life to hear that we can never be separated from the love of God?

Take Action:

Evaluate how you handle problems and curveballs. If you don’t like how you react, take steps to change those behaviors. Name what you believe about life, God, and yourself that is causing you to respond the way you do. Now try to name what you need to know and what do you need to believe for your actions to change.

Love Drives Out Fear

“The Lord disciplines those he loves, as a father the son he delights in.” —Proverbs 3:12

Sometimes human fathers struggle to show love well to their children. Even the best dads get irritable and say and do things that are just plain unloving.

But as any good parent—or any wise adult—will tell you, fathers discipline their children out of deep love and concern for them. Dads correct their children if they run into the street after being clearly told not to do so. A father who cares for the success of his child will even help him or her create disciplines in their life—good habits of study, work, play, nutrition, sleep, and so on.

The Bible teaches us that God is a perfect father, unlike any on earth. Sometimes, like children, we may not understand his love and may view his discipline as punishment. We may even struggle with fear of him, particularly if we didn’t have a good example of fatherhood in our own dads.

But we learn in Scripture that “perfect love drives out fear.”^[1] As we submit to the leadership of a perfect father, our fears are assuaged. He teaches us through his loving discipline how to be his children, those who follow his way of love.

Consider This:

1. What has your experience of children been like (your own, your friends’, even those you see in the grocery store)?
2. Why do children need to be lovingly disciplined?

Take Action:

Have you been holding off on starting a new workout regimen? Perhaps you’ve been wanting to start a new hobby, read through the classics, or learn another language. Whatever the case may be, set about taking the first steps of instilling a new discipline in your life because of your desire to grow as an individual (a healthy version of self-love called “self-care”).

Love Rights Wrongs

Two wrongs never make a right, but one loving action can right many wrongs.

Consider the following images:

A child comes in from a bike crash, with banged-up hands and knees. Running to her mom, she cries, “Kiss it and make it better, Mommy!” Smiling, her mother complies. Her mother’s love tells her, “It’s all right; now get up and try again!”

A man puts his foot in his mouth, unintentionally saying something that could embarrass his wife. But she laughs. She is not identified by her foibles, and her love for him tells him he isn’t identified by his either.

A hungry homeless man steals a candy bar. The security guard catches him and brings him back into the store. But instead of punishing him, the guard pays for the candy bar as well as a ham sandwich, an apple, and a carton of milk. Love wiped the slate clean for the hungry thief, and even satisfied his hunger.

The apostle Peter wrote: “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Each of the illustrations above communicates in some way this type of love that we read about in the Bible: a love that rights wrongs.

Consider This:

1. How have you been wronged recently? How did you respond?
2. When did you last act wrongfully toward another? How did they respond to you?

Take Action:

Write down at least three things that hinder you from expressing love toward those who “sin against” you. Circle one of them and write down some practical steps you can take to push back against those impediments through deeply loving actions.

Faith, Hope, and Love

Faith, hope, and love enable us to build meaningful relationships—but the greatest gift is love.

“These three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” —1 Corinthians 13:13

As we navigate life, its many bumps and detours can cause timeless words such as “faith,” “hope,” and especially “love” to lose their meaning. Worse, we begin to fail to observe their beauty and goodness as a result of our growing cynicism and suspicion.

But these three gifts are indispensable.

To build meaningful relationships, we must have faith in ourselves, in others, and in God, the one who sustains us. Others will often let us down—just as we let ourselves down at times. These human disappointments can chip away at our faith, even in God, unless we have hope.

Hope, rooted in the good things we have experienced, allows us to move through disappointment, keeping us actively engaged in our relationships. Through hope, we can turn the next page, trusting that the future holds possibilities of beauty and goodness. Hope is the anticipation that the story is still unfolding—that a happy ending awaits.

That happy ending is love. When all else passes away, the final word will be love, because the one who made heaven and earth promises it will be so.

Consider This:

1. What would you need to know, feel, and experience to bolster your faith in yourself, others, and God?
2. If you are currently feeling hopeless, where can you look in your life and the world around you to have that hope replenished?

Take Action:

Think of someone you love—your wife, husband, son, daughter, mom, dad, best friend. Create a habit of telling them how much you love them. Notice how it affects their outlook on life. Seek out the resources you need to bolster your own faith and hope. Start by recognizing that you are loved.

The Golden Rule

“Do to others as you would have them do to you.” —Luke 6:31

The Bible has been called a manual on how to love. It extensively expounds upon both the law of love and the desire we have for it. Love is a law written on our own hearts; the Bible helps us understand why that is. As does life itself.

For example, if you have ever locked yourself out of your car or your house, you may remember how desperate you felt for help. Perhaps a neighbor or friend opened their home to you while you waited for a spouse, roommate, or locksmith. Or perhaps someone brought a spare key to you from across town. Whatever the case, you were shown care through their service. You recognized love in their one small act, and you wanted to serve them in return.

On the other hand, neighbors do not generally go around purposefully tearing up one another’s gardens, intentionally running over children’s toys, or spitefully stealing one another’s mail—and it’s not just governmental law that deters them.  We all want to live in the safety of love’s auspices.

The Golden Rule is so labeled because we prize it. Love is more precious than gold—to be loved is the greatest commodity on earth.

Consider This:

1. How has someone at work, in your neighborhood, or even a stranger served you in the past?
2. How can you serve and love others around you in meaningful ways?

Take Action:

Consider the second question above. Jot down several ideas and act on just one of them over the next week. Watch others’ reactions. Can you tell love is precious to them, too?

 

Love Your Enemies

Love overthrows its opponents, making enemies into friends.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven.” —Matthew 5:43–45

What?!  An enemy is defined as “one that is antagonistic to another; especially: one seeking to injure, overthrow, or confound an opponent. And I’m supposed to love someone who threatens to harm me? I don’t even want to get close to them.

Elsewhere in Scripture, it says that while we were enemies of God, he died for us! His love led him to great injury, but his injury and death were the actions that confounded his enemies. For through them, he made his enemies his friends.

We can’t love perfectly as God loves. But we can understand more profoundly what his love is like—and be blessed in the process—as we seek to love like he loves.

Consider This:

1. How have you responded in the past to an irritating neighbor, classmate, or colleague?
2. Who is someone toward whom you could act in a more loving way?

Take Action:

Actively think about ways you can love those people you don’t necessarily like. Be the one to embrace them. You can start with something as simple as a smile and greeting. Watch how even the simplest acts of love can transform a relationship from enmity to friendship.

The Source of Love

“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” —1 John 4:8

Think of life as a road winding through an arid land. Travelers on that road depend on some resource of water outside of themselves to survive—and unless they have water to spare, sharing in any meaningful way just isn’t an option.

Everyone, at some point in their lives, has faced the dilemma of looking across at a person they should love (husband, wife, mother, father, sister, brother, best friend, etc.), and finding themselves completely unable to summon that emotion. It may have been during a major conflict, or it might have just been a grumpy day. But the resources of love have been depleted, and there’s just nothing left to share.

Just as we are dependent on resources outside of ourselves to sustain our life, loverequires resources beyond our own. Human love is feeble. It is worn threadbare by the rough roads of life. If we do not have a reservoir of love outside ourselves, we will dry up and become unable to love others.

The Bible teaches us that there is a resource of love available to us in God, who by nature is love! If we know and experience God, we will both know and show love.

Consider This:

1. What resources have you relied on to generate love for others in the past?
2. How is love like water?

Take Action:

Create your own metaphor for love. What is love like to you? Why?

Our First Love

“We love because he first loved us.” —1 John 4:19

You remember your first love—that exhilarating feeling, sweaty palms, notes passed in class, stolen glances. You’d never felt that way before; you were never going to let that feeling slip away . . . but, more than likely, it did. In human relationships, the waves of emotions tied to a first love eventually lessen and fade away to something more like the calm after a storm.

But God’s love is not like temporal human love. With an eternal God, his love does not diminish and it certainly doesn’t go away. In fact, he loved each of us so much that he gave up his only Son to save us from the consequences of our sins.

He constantly displays that intense love for you.

God’s love is strong and unbreakable—an always and forever love. It never gives up and never ends. Now that’s a serious first love! With such a compelling and beautiful love, our hearts can’t help but respond. We love because he first loved us.

Consider This:

1. How does the idea of everlasting love affect your heart and your mind?
2. What do you have to do to deserve that love?

Take Action:

Today, each time you feel lonely or unworthy or overwhelmed, remind yourself that you are loved—today and always, no matter what.